Tuesday, March 27, 2012

WWE Monday Night Raw Thoughts: 3/26/2012



Last night's episode was another underwhelming effort as far as the Road to Wrestlemania goes.  The WWE has given us one of the worst builds to Wrestlemania in recent memory.  Lucky for them, the card is as stacked as ever!  So which matches got the most out of the "go home" episode of Raw?  Find out after the jump!





First off, The Rock and John Cena special was pretty awesome!



THE BIGGEST MATCH OF THE YEAR



I thoroughly enjoyed a deeper look inside both men's lives.  You really should respect both these guys for how far they have come and everything they've done for the business.  That being said, I thought the WWE did a great job at building even more hype for this match.  Say what you want about The Rock coming back and Cena yet again stealing the main event spot, but THIS is a true Main Event!  Wrestlemania was built on matches like this and it's easily the biggest match you could book right now.  It's going to be a match for the ages, so stop being so negative and enjoy the ride because shit like this only happens once in a blue moon.  I know I sound like I'm part of the WWE hype machine but I don't think people are appreciating the magnitude of a match like this. 



Now on to the final Monday Night Raw before Wrestlemania!!



Match 1: Randy Orton and Sheamus vs. Kane and World Heavyweight Champion Daniel Bryan


I thought it was pretty interesting that they opened the show with a big match like this.  Usually we have a promo by a top star so this was a nice surprise.  As far as the match goes, pretty much what you would expect here.  Some pretty exciting action and the crowd was really into it.  I loved the bit at the end with Daniel Bryan using AJ to distract Sheamus, letting Kane level him with a Chokeslam and then Bryan sliding in to pick up the victory.  Good match to open the show.


Match Rating: ***



"Jeepers!  Please don't hurt me mister!"



So Michael Cole is the official commentator for Team Johnny.  Just when you think the team couldn't get any more douchy....



If you own one of these, kill yourself....immediately



Match 2: United States Champion Santino Marella vs. David Otunga


Again we have a match between these two in a weak attempt to plug the TAG TEAM MATCH PLAYA!  Fine by me, but again the most entertaining part of it is the interaction between the two GMs at the end.  Oh and The Miz is now on the team....officially giving him the "we don't have anything for you" treatment.  Whatever, this match should serve us a slice of entertainment pie in a show full of great matches.  That being said, I can't complain about anything here.


Match Rating: **



"PAY ATTENTION TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE"



"I was once WWE Champion....remember?" 



Cool "End of an Era" package.  This match had a perfect build in the past weeks, I didn't see much reason to have another promo recycling the same shit again this week.  The video package was a good way to promote the match without forcefully throwing another segment in the Taker/HHH/HBK love triangle.  I mean c'mon, do you REALLY need any other reason to be pumped for this match other than the fact that it's HHH vs. Undertaker in a HELL In A Cell!!!!!!!????  Mark my words, Shawn Michaels will find a way to steal the show even with his limited involvement.  It's in his DNA, he just doesn't know how not to.



Match 3: Eve vs. Kelly Kelly


Another match that served no real purpose.  Unless you make this match a "loser gets ass naked and has lesbian sex with their partner" match, then your not really going to get anyone who doesn't watch those Hollywood Reporter esque shows, to care about their Wrestlemania match at all.  Sorry to say, but like everyone else, I'm still a little salty that my Beth vs. Kharma dream match hasn't been booked here.  I thought Beth did an outstanding job as Divas Champion and deserves a payoff for her hard work.  And no, getting squashed by a C-list celeb and a diva you've already beaten clean more than once is not a payoff.  Still, I could care less.  The card is already loaded with potential Match of the Year candidates.


Match Rating: *



Match 4: WWE Champion CM Punk vs. Christian


I was a bit disappointed with this one.  Don't get me wrong the Promo by Jericho was great and I loved that he's in Punk's head and that Punk lost his shit and beat the hell out of Christian (that GTS on the steel steps was sick!), but I was actually looking forward to seeing two of the best workers in the company go at it.  Still, I'm digging the old school feel of this feud. 



U MAD?



Back in January, I promised you all that Jericho would deliver the goods before Mania and I was right.  The man knows how to get under people's skin and tonight was no different.  Loved everything about this segment.  This match is on a fast track to legendary status if it lives up to my expectations.  I'm gonna throw my hand in and say that I think they will play the Steamboat & Savage to Rock and Cena's Hogan & Andre.  Fuck, Wrestlemania is going to be awesome!


Match Rating: N/A



Match 5: Brodus Clay vs. Curt Hawkins


Booker T's reaction to the Funkettes fits my sediments exactly.  There is so much ass to ass going on here that Brodus Clay is beginning to become an afterthought in his own entrance!  The match itself couldn't even take my mind off of what I had just seen, but that's probably because it's the same old shit we've been getting from the big man since his return.  He's become an above average comedy act, but not much more at this point.


Match Rating: *



Gotta say, I've been going through a bit of Rosa Mendes withdrawal over the past couple of weeks.  I never thought it was possible, but my eyes get bored when she's not on screen. 



BRB, gotta change the underwear again



Match 6: The Big Show vs. Primo


Kinda disappointed that the tag team division has taken almost as many steps back that they've taken forward, undoing months of hard work in a matter of weeks.  The champs have earned enough momentum to at least have been featured as a part of Team Johnny.  It's a bit of a shame, but not as big of a shame as Primo being used as squash meat here.  What?  Was Tyler Reks too busy?  Great post match promo by Cody Rhodes though.  I fully expect the IC title match to be the sleeper hit of the night at Mania thanks to the great work Cody has done recently.


Match Rating: *1/4



Zack Ryder is still immensely popular but he has lately been used as a backstage character again.  Not sure why but at least he has a match at Wrestlemania.  I also could care less about where his relationship with Eve is going at this point.  CM Punk's backstage promo was worth noting here though, so don't hold down on the fast forward button for too long here.



Match 7: Mark Henry vs. The Great Khali


Mark Henry makes quick work of Khali here as he should.  As I noted last week, I'm more than happy to see Mark Henry being booked like a monster again.  He is obviously being billed as the anchor of Johnny Ace's team.  I like the idea, and the spot with him catching Kofi Kingston was great.  Cool to have Booker T involved in the match as well.  I have a feeling it will come down to the Book man and Henry in the final moments of the match.  Should be good, but would someone PLEASE stop giving Teddy Long a microphone.  For Christ's sake, "Tag team match" is pretty much the only thing he can say without stammering.



Maybe they should hire this guy to be his assistant instead of Santino






Match Rating: *3/4



The MAIN EVENT of the night was the final verbal jousting between The Rock and John Cena.  You could again really feel the tension between these two icons



Their faces SCREAM "I wanna punch your face until it looks like Rikishi's ass"



With THAT kind of heat, they're definitely going to come to blows right?  I mean, this is the final Raw before Wrestlemania and they've been biting at each other's heels for over a year now so there's no more room for words here....they've GOTTA fight here....right?....



No because the WWE hates me....



Good mic work here by both men and I can understand the idea of them not touching until Mania, but not even a couple right hands leading to a run-in by some indie wrestlers and a few FCW guys....(Um, I mean, security)....Really? Good segment overall, the people can't get any more pumped for this then they already are, but I think having these two start trading fists would have really sold the legit heat between them.  Fuck it, it's going to be one of the truly great matches in WWE history either way.






Overall episode rating: 6.0 (Solid during any other time of the year, but for a "go home" episode of Raw before Mania it was a piece of shit)


What to watch if you DVR'd the episode: The Punk/Christian "match" and Cody Rhodes promos were the only real entertaining parts of the show for me.  The opener was solid if you're looking for some action, but you can skip the Rock/Cena confrontation.  They didn't say or...sigh....DO anything they haven't done in the past few weeks.

1 comment:

  1. I agree with most of your thoughts, other than I actually think they did a great job hyping up Wrestlemania :)

    ReplyDelete